Word of the Year

It's 2015, y'all!!  Crazy how time just zooms by...

Now, I am not one to make New Year's Resolutions. It's not because I don't like them or don't want to change. The truth is I am never good at keeping them past the first week (who really is?) and then I'd feel guilty that I couldn't reach this random goal I had set for myself. Therefore, I wouldn't set a goal. You can't fail if there is no bar, right?  (Geez, who let this girl in here??)

Well as depressing as that sounds, I have decided instead of setting a goal, I would adopt a word for the year. Seems a little more my speed. Something to keep at the back of my mind to keep me on track throughout the year. A word that will influence my decisions, no matter what category they fall under.

So, without further ado...**drumroll please**

 The word for 2015: 

INTENTIONAL

"Done on purpose; deliberate"

Why, you may ask? I feel as though this idea has been lacking in my life and it is as good of time as any to insert it. It's as if I have just been going through each day, doing things not because I want to or because it makes an impact; it's more because I feel like I must go through the motions to survive. I want to thrive, not just survive! I want to be more intentional in so many areas, including but not limited to:

• My marriage
• Friend relationships
• Work
• Fitness and healthy eating
• My time

So far, I have been allowing the things around me and life in general to dictate me, my thoughts, my actions. I have been allowing other people and things define who I am, who I should be, what I should be doing and when. Not okay, people! It is draining trying to contort who I am into something I am not. News flash, Tara: that was not the Big Man's intention when He made you.

It is time for a reboot. It's time to get back to the basics and simplify by being intentional with my time, how I spend it, who I spend it with, and what I will NOT spend it on.

In 2015, I will:

- Seek ways to know and understand my husband's heart

- Dine with the women in my circle so that I know specific ways I can pray for them

- Approach my work as if I am working for the Lord, not man

- Participate in an active setting that I find fun and life-giving, not because I feel like I have to be there

- Feed my desire for learning to cook wholesome meals for my family

- Schedule time for myself so that I can be the best version of me

- Not allow other people's successes define my own

- Make mistakes, and make every effort to learn from them and move on

- Hold myself to a standard of GRACE, not PERFECTION

I am excited about 2015 and can already start to feel a weight being lifted off of me. Here's to a new year!

From my heart...

Your turn: Do you make New Year's Resolutions?  What do you hope 2015 will bring?  

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Husband Brag

If I can just give one piece of advice today to men and women...

Ladies - Find a man who can cook!

Gentlemen - If you don't know how to cook, learn!

I have to take a moment for a husband brag.  Yesterday, while I was off visiting my sister and baby niece, my wonderful husband slaved away in the kitchen making homemade vegetable soup and parmesan and herb bread for dinner.  

I came home to our apartment smelling of deliciousness and I did not have to spend my time thinking about what to cook.  It was such a wonderful break and MAN can Hubs cook!!  Thanks, honey!

...from my kitchen.

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Southwest Quinoa

Quinoa is definitely on my top 5 favorite foods to cook with.  It is so easy to combine this super grain/seed with any veggies and a yummy sauce and BOOM!  You've got dinner!  Plus, it's easy to make a large batch so you have delicious leftovers for lunch.

Quinoa is a grain that produces these little seeds, which is the part you actually eat.  It is packed full of protein and the good fats (Omega 3 fatty acids and monounsaturated).  Quinoa is a great replacement for rice in Asian stir fry that provides more nutrition with less bulk.

Emily Ho over on The Kitchn taught me how to cook quinoa perfectly! It's so light and fluffy when it is done...just perfect.  The trick is, after rinsing the quinoa, you place it in the sauce pan without water and let the water evaporate off the seeds.  Then you add the water and start cooking.  It's crazy how big of a difference that step makes!

Okay, enough about quinoa...let's get to it!

Southwest Quinoa

Servings: 6 (great for leftovers!)

Nutrition Info (per serving):  Calories - 307; Total fat - 6g; Cholesterol - 10mg; Sodium - 138mg; Total Carbs - 54g; Fiber - 7g; Protein - 11g

What you need:
1 cup quinoa, uncooked

2 cups water

1/2 cup dried black beans (or 1 can of black beans, drained and rinsed)
1 tbsp oil

1 onion, diced

1 green bell pepper, diced

1/2 tomato, diced

1 can sweet yellow corn, drained (or 1 cup frozen, thawed)

Salt and pepper, to taste

3/4 to 1 tsp chili powder

1/2 tsp cumin

1/2 cup vinegar based BBQ sauce

Few dashes of Chipotle hot sauce (optional)

1/2 cup cheddar cheese, shredded

Chopped cilantro for garnish

I started with cooking the black beans.  After they had been soaking for 22 hours, I drained and rinsed them, then placed them in a medium saucepan with 2-3 cups of water.  I brought the water to a low boil and kept it there for 45 minutes, adding water as needed.  Be sure to stir occasionally so the beans don't stick to the pot.  After 45 minutes, I did the 5 bean test (eating 5 beans and if all 5 are soft/edible, they're done!) and they passed!  Sidenote: I learned that little trick from Anne Burrell on the Food Network...love her!

While the beans were cooking, I diced all of my veggies that needed to be diced, opened cans, and prepped everything to be cooked.

With about 20 minutes left on the beans, I began prepping and cooking the quinoa, following the method on The Kitchn.  It takes about 15 minutes to sit and absorb the water, which allowed me time to cook the veggies.

I put about a tablespoon of oil into my cast iron skillet (you can use any skillet, this is just my favorite and I use it for just about ANYTHING!) and brought it up to medium heat.  Once it was ready I tossed in my diced green bell pepper and onion.  Now you don't want these to cook too fast, so feel free to lower the heat slightly to get the onions to slightly transparent but not brown (I had to turn mine down just a smidge).  Sprinkle with your salt, pepper, chili powder and cumin.

Next, invite the corn to the veggie party and cook until heated through.  Make sure you watch the pan and stir occasionally to prevent burning.  At this point, the beans should be done.  Drain and rinse them so they can attend the veggie party as well!
Take the peppers, onions and corn off the heat.  Add the diced tomato and black beans, cover, and set aside.

Placed the cooked quinoa into a large bowl and add the barbecue sauce.  Mix well!  Next, dump the veggies into the bowl and mix it all together.  Taste it to make sure you like the seasoning amounts and adjust as necessary.

Once it tastes just right, spoon the mixture into bowls, sprinkle a little shredded cheddar cheese on top, throw a few dashes of chipotle hot sauce on there and adorn it with chopped cilantro.  Bon appetite!

From my kitchen...

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Monday Mayhem

Mayhem is the perfect word for what is going on in our living room at this moment...

It all started last week when we had the sub-freezing temperatures here in Atlanta.  Hubs and I prepared ourselves and the apartment for some chilly nights which included pulling down multiple blankets from the closet, fixing hot chocolate, and leaving the faucet dripping through the night.  We survived the cold temps...or so we thought.

Saturday night rolls around and we noticed a dark spot in the corner of our ceiling, like a wet spot.  So like any good tenant, we called maintenance (the perks of renting!).  They came out and gave us the spiel about the fire sprinkler pipes freezing during the beginning of the week and they are now finding out where they have all broken.  Lucky us, the wonderful pipes chose our apartment to bust above.  However, they are having to fix this in a lot of the buildings, so it would be a little while until they could get to our apartment.

Which brings us to what I though would be a quiet, productive Monday...

Three fire safety workers, one maintenance contractor, 5 maintenance workers, and two hours later, my apartment looks like this:

All of those boxes on the futon are from our storage closet outside, that I had to completely clear out so they could cut a huge hole in the ceiling to fix the broken pipe.  Guess we won't be watching any Parenthood on Netflix tonight.

Then, they ripped out the baseboards and crown molding to circulate air through the wall so it can dry.  How do they do this? Just that EXTRA LARGE green dehumidifier (aka Big Green) and two fan blowers running constantly for the next 72 hours...#nbd

Oh, and this is my desk for today.  It has been one heck of a Monday!  Praying Hubs and I can get some sleep tonight.  Big Green is noisy!!

From my home...

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Might as well face, you're addicted to...Sugar

I can't get enough of that sweet stuff.  My taste buds dance at the thought of a freshly baked cookie a few minutes after it has come out of the oven.  I look forward to birthdays so I can have a piece of delicious birthday cake.  I crave ice cream when it's 7 degrees outside.  The holidays are the best time of year because I am surrounded by sweets and nobody looks at you twice for sampling all of them.

It's terrible.  So terrible that my husband declared this week a "No Sugar" week in our household.  Hold. The. Phone.  So you're telling me I can't have those two Reese's Christmas trees sitting there staring at me?  Or the oatmeal chocolate chip cookies I baked for New Year's Eve? Not even the white chocolate peppermint bark left over from Christmas. As reluctant as I was to take part in this excruciating endeavor, I knew I needed to do it for the sake of my way in the future children (or something).  So I did.

I'm on day 5 and the sugar plums dancing in my head have not subsided.  I am, however, proud of myself that I have not had any sugar in FIVE FREAKING DAYS!!  I'm pretty sure that has never happened in my life.  Ever.

Day 1 was pretty tough...especially because I was PMSing hardcore (too much information?  oh well...) and just wanted to eat everything sweet in sight. But I will say, it has gotten easier to say no.  The desire is still deep inside my soul, and the first thing I want to do on Sunday is bake a batch of brownies, but I think this week has made me realize how much I grab a mini candy bar when I'm bored and dismiss the effects it has on my health.

After reading a few articles about different kinds of sugar and sugar alternatives, I have reached a conclusion.  Am I going to cut out sweet food forever?  Nope.  But I am going to be smart about when I do eat sweets.  As a woman who loves to bake (it is like my therapy), I will try better forms of natural sweeteners (I've heard coconut palm sugar is the best natural sweetener) instead of the white processed kind.  I will also make fewer servings so that I will be tempted less to snack on them (i.e. I usually make the entire batch of 5 dozen cookies...I will cut it down to one).  I am telling you all this for accountability!

It's all about moderation people.

From my heart (and taste buds)...

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Saturday with the Meinckes (+Guacamole Recipe)

This weekend my body decided it needed a break, so it came down with a cold.  Although I hate being sick, having a darn good reason to sit on the couch and watch football all day without feeling guilty is nice every now and then.  And that's what I did.

Picture that my husband Instagrammed Saturday afternoon...yes, that is TWO football games at the same time. Do I get some wife points for that one?

Football around here is kind of a big deal, especially if the Georgia Bulldogs are playing.  Alan and I both graduated from the University of Georgia for both our undergraduate and graduate degrees.  We bleed red and black.  Although this season was a little rough for our Dawgs, we still enjoy the game and love watching college football on TV.

I did choose to do something productive on Saturday and made guacamole and salsa.  These two dips are a staple in this household, especially during football.  I adapted my guacamole recipe from a friend of mine's and sort of duplicated it with the salsa recipe (minus the avocados, of course).

I usually start with two avocados for just Alan and me to eat, but double or even triple the recipe if I am making it for a crowd.  You can also adjust the seasonings according to your taste (more cumin if you want a more earthy taste, more cayenne or crushed red pepper for more heat, more garlic powder for more...well, garlicy flavor).  I choose to de-seed the jalapeño, but if you like it real spicy, leave them in!  Just make sure you warn your guests =).

Homemade Chunky Guacamole (serves 2)

2 avocados
1/2 tomato, diced
1/4 onion, diced
2 Tbsp diced cilantro
1/2 jalapeño, de-seeded
1 Tbsp fresh lime juice (about 1/2 of a lime)
1/4 tsp cumin
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1/8 tsp crushed red pepper
1/8 tsp cayenne pepper
salt and pepper to taste

1. Slice the avocado in half, remove the pit, and scoop out the soft inside into a bowl.
2. Add the rest of the ingredients to the bowl and stir to combine.  The more you stir, the less chunky it becomes, so stir to your desired texture preference.

Grab a bag of your favorite tortilla chips and enjoy!

(P.S. - I'll post the salsa recipe in a later blog post.)

From my kitchen...

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Trust

The other night while lying in bed, my husband asked me a simple question:

"What has been the biggest difference between what you imagined marriage would be like and the reality of marriage?"

He's really good at asking thought-provoking questions (super attractive!), we just need to work on the timing of those questions.  Therefore, at 11:30pm, I start a stream of thoughts and accidentally open my mouth while random words that did not make sense start flowing out.  I don't remember if I actually gave a coherent answer that night, but it did make me think about it a bit more over the next couple of days.

I thought about the gamut of issues newlyweds go through during their first year of marriage--learning all the quirks of your spouse, figuring out how to live together peacefully, intimacy, dealing with conflict.  Then it came to me.  The one thing that completely came out of left field, that I'm even just now realizing that I did not expect to be an issue:

The first thought that might pop into your head, given our current culture, is that I'm talking about trusting my husband not to cheat on me or not to look at another woman (which is valid).  However, those are not my concerns.  I'm talking about the kind of trust you have with someone that allows you to be completely vulnerable with them.  Let them into your mess, witness your flaws, embrace your weaknesses.  Let you be exactly who you are around them with no hesitation.

Merriam-Webster defines trust as: "assured reliance on the character, ability, strength or truth of someone or something; one in which confidence is placed."

When I read that, I immediately want to argue that I DO trust my husband.  I believe his character, ability, strength AND truth are all reliable...that's why I married him!  However, digging deeper into that, I discover that while I trust my husband with our relationship, finances and familial well-being, I am terrified to allow him into my mess, to be vulnerable.  To witness my flaws and experience my weaknesses.  I have this engrained belief that I must be perfect for someone to love me so deeply as he does.  Therefore I must hide all these "shortcomings" I believe I have.

But why??  He married me for ALL of me.  Not just for the warm fuzzies in our relationship, but because he wants to be there for me in my weakness, swim with me in my mess, and embrace every single flaw (even the not-so-pretty ones).  Which blows. my. mind.

Why would someone want to take on my burdens, my mess, the not-so-good side of me?

Because marriage is a direct reflection of the love Christ has for us.  Christ loves us so much that He came into this world, completely aware of the mess we were in, and sacrificed his LIFE to help clean us up.  He wants to have an intimate relationship with us.  He didn't come into the world expecting perfection.  He meets us where we are, no matter how disheveled.  He invites us to trust Him and allow Him to enter into every aspect of our lives, not just the shiny parts.

Most people know the words from John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that he gave His only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."  But keep reading.  Verse 17 says, "For God did not send his son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him."

My husband did not marry me to condemn me for being flawed, just like Jesus did not die for my sins to condemn me for being flawed.  So why is it such a struggle to invite them into my heart that is not always spotless?

It is so easy to only show the clean, perfectly pressed and manicured side of your life to your spouse, but it takes an amazing amount of trust to allow them into every nook and cranny of your heart.  Just like we are suppose to allow Christ into our heart, into every single aspect of our life.

In conclusion, have I figured out this whole trust issue?  Nope.  I reckon it will take some time for this engrained belief that I must be perfect in order for someone to love me to be overtaken with the truth that my husband is FOR me, flaws and all, just like my Savior is FOR me.  But I'm working on it.  One weakness at a time.  One admission at a time.  One tear-filled conversation followed by the biggest husband-bear-hug at a time.

From my heart...

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